


Get paid. Get laid. Gatorade.

by lordjenjen



Series: Get Paid. Get Laid. Gatorade. [1]
Category: South Park
Genre: Kenny is the one that dies, M/M, So It Doesn't Count, Stan would be 31 in October and the others just turned 30, anyone else realize that if these asshole kids aged like normal people, assholes, takes place in the future
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-12
Updated: 2017-09-12
Packaged: 2018-12-26 17:44:29
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Major Character Death, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,765
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12063915
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lordjenjen/pseuds/lordjenjen
Summary: It was a simple concept. Get paid. Get laid. Gatorade. This was Kenny's life motto.It's about half plot. Half porn.





	Get paid. Get laid. Gatorade.

Get Paid. Get Laid. Gatorade.

  
  
**Get Paid**

Every morning Kenny would wake up and check his phone. The escort agency he worked for would send him a message about potential clients. Kenny would chose the ones he was willing to take out and get ready for the day. He was pretty happy with his life so far. 

After leading the way in legalizing marijuana, Colorado legalizes prostitution. Kenny found his calling. When it became legal a few months after he turned 18, Kenny jumped on board the private sector. Unlike other male sex workers at the time, Kenny was both clean and open to anyone. He made good money even after taxes.

So when he was offered a job, he had a hard time saying yes. However, nine years later, he's glad he did. The company he was working for was basically a “high class escort" business. His job was to be someone's date for however long (the day, an evening, ect) and that was it. They charged by the hour, and if the customer wanted sex, well that was between the two if them. Kenny rarely turned it down, after all, it is a part of his motto and customers always “tipped” for sex. 

Put it simply, Kenny could work four hours plus have sex, and make more than a day being his own boss.

He loved it.

This morning he had been offered two jobs. One was a lunch date from a regular. He knew it would only be an hour, but the lady paid a good chunk of his rent in tips. 

The other confused Kenny for a moment. He knew the agency allowed clients to choose their date either by description or photo, or be assigned a random escort. He stared and the name knowing full well it could be no one else. He momentarily thought about cancelling but he realized this could be fun. 

The instructions were very clear. Kenny needed to be dressed like he was going to see the queen. He knew her old sack of bones wouldn't be, but he wouldn't be surprised either. He had been hired for the whole evening which, if course, the customer had paid a pretty penny for, but also meant it was going to be a long night of smiles and pretending to care.

Kenny left his modest apartment and headed for his favorite clothing shop. He was a regular here and the owner loved him. Kenny had gone with her to a few events and in exchange he had a lifetime discount. She also owned a rental shop and always kept a dress and tux in back for Kenny. 

He entered the shop and looked at the man behind the counter. With no words being exchanged, he pointed to the back of the shop and made the phone sign before turning his attention back to the customer at the counter. Kenny made his way into the back and listened outside the office. She wasn't yelling so he took this as a good sign. He opened the door and leaned against the door frame. She hated when Kenny looked too cock so he did it often. 

“My Vivian Ward is here.” Rachel propped her feet up on her desk, purposely showing Kenny her long legs. Her dark skin disappeared underneath the hem of her yellow dress. Kenny was jealous of her gorgeous legs, that he found insanely hot, and her ability to wear bright and vivid colors. And she knew this.

“So glad I'm you're pretty woman.”

“You know you make a beautiful woman, but what brings you here today?”

Kenny walked into the office, closing the door behind him, and took a seat at the desk.

“Rachel. Buttercup. My African Queen.”

“You know my black ass was born and raised here in Colorado. Why are you trying to butter me up?”

“I need your help. I need to look like I'm about to greet royalty.”

“Are you?”

“I could be. But this is more to show off.”

Rachel's smile turned from polite to dazzling. “Oh baby, I'm about to give you the Pretty Woman treatment. When?”

“I have an appointment in an hour then I have to meet this guy at 6.”

“Good. I need to call a few people. You be back here no later than 1.”

***

Kenny smiled as he entered the upscale apartment building. He was quite nervous seeing as he wasn’t sure how his client would react, but he was also excited. This was going to be an entertaining night. Kenny pressed the elevator button for the floor he knew well and entered in the pin code. The elevator stopped and he got out and went to the familiar apartment. He knocked and walked in when a voice yelled from the other side.

“I’ll be down in a moment,” a familiar voice yelled from upstairs. 

Kenny took a few steps into the apartment to have a look around. He knew his client was well off, after all, he actually  _ knew _ his client, but he never suspected he showed off this much. Any time they met for lunch, he was dressed nice, but not, 4 grand a month apartment nice.

“Sorry for the wai-” 

Kenny turned to the stairs, grin plastered on his face. “Hey Kyle.”

“What the hell are you doing, Kenny?”

“I’m your date tonight.”

The color drained from Kyle’s face before returning in the form of a blush. “You never said you worked for, Louis.”

“You never asked. You knew I was an escort.”

“I thought you were- Wait! You work for Louis!”

“Yeah, we’ve already established that. And you hired me for the evening.”

“You’re their best employee.” Kenny knew Kyle was thinking of the fact he never put up a fight when Kyle paid for lunch. How he would dress in decent clothes but nothing too nice.

He also now knew Kenny’s real secret. Kenny only acted like he lived a decent life. The truth was he was pretty well off. He paid off Karen’s college loans, donated a good amount to shelters, bought nice things every once and awhile, and still had money left to save and invest. He lived a modest life because, unlike Kyle, he didn’t want to show off his money.

“I guess I am. Never heard them say it before, but I am quite popular. Must be why you hired me. Now, sir, I believe we have an event to be to?”

“Fuck! I needed you hear early because-” Kyle drug his hand down his face. “Because I need you to pose as my fiance. I needed to go over some things but, you already know me.”

Kenny’s smile dropped a little. “Kyle, why are you telling people you’re engaged? Does this have to do with Tiffany?”

Kyle’s blush deepened. “A little. After we broke up, my boss thought I was focusing too much on work. He’s a little more… traditional. He feels like you should be married to your work, but still have a family. He wasn’t sure I was ready for a promotion. Like, duh, I am after all one of the best.”

“So you told your boss you’re engaged?”

“Yeah, but I can’t avoid not bringing someone too these things.” Kyle fell backwards into one of his plushy chairs and motioned for Kenny to do the same.

Kenny’s face went completely neutral. “Okay, besides everything about your personal life, that I would like to believe I have locked down pretty good, is there anything else I need to know?”

Kyle snorted. “Not really. You’re already good at sweet talking so you just have to learn people I work with.” The redhead looked up. “You look very nice by the way.”

“Thanks. Well worth the money spent.”

Kyle laughed. “I just realized how much of a shit head you are. You knew all day! And you didn’t tell me.”

Kenny smiled at his friend. “Nah, this was far more fun. You look nice as well.”

The two spent their time talking as friends before leaving. Kyle had a ride waiting for them, he insisted neither were driving his precious electric car. The whole ride, Kenny was internally screaming. Kyle wanted engaged and he would get it, Kenny was a professional after all. There wouldn’t even be much pretending on Kenny’s part, he had always harbored a little crush on his friend, especially in high school and college. 

“What do you want? Hand holding, touching, me hanging off your arm?” Kenny asked as the car pulled up to the building.

“Loving without being clingy?”

“Alrighty! Stay.” Kenny quickly got out of the car and opened Kyle’s door. He held his hand out for the redhead. Kyle gave him a slight grin and took it and got out of the car. 

Before they entered the building, Kenny stopped, straightened Kyle’s tie, and gave him a little kiss. “There. That’s better.”

Kenny quickly realized this was nothing more than rich people getting together to make business deals. He played the loving fiance well. He charmed people and told a mostly true story of how him and Kyle met and got engaged. He would place a loving hand on Kyle and whisper something into his ear.

“Ah! Broflovski!”

“Shit.” Kyle whispered and downed his wine. “Mr. Johnson.”

Kenny turned away from the group of younger people they had been talking to and looked in the same direction as Kyle. He smiled politely at the older portly man and his wife, whom he recognized. 

“Kenny, this is my boss, Mr. Johnson and his wife..”

Kenny gave Kyle’s boss and firm enough handshake. “It’s a pleasure to meet you, sir.”

He then took his wife’s hand and kissed it. “And a pleasure to see someone so young and radiant as yourself.”

“Oh stop it, you.” 

“Mr and Mrs Johnson, this is my fiance, Kenneth McCormick.”

“Your fiance?”

Kenny could feel Kyle stiffen beside him. He lightly place his hand Kyle’s lower back. “Yes. I am sorry I haven’t been able to attend anything previous to this. I have been incredibly busy with work.”

“That’s so wonderful!” Mrs Johnson exclaimed. “I was honestly worried about our darling little Kyle.”

“Nancy-”

“Shush, Albert. You know I would have adopted him by now if I could. Come Kenneth.”

“You can call me Kenny, ma-”

“You say ma’am and I will bop you. Come, let’s go chat at the bar. I need a refill.”

Kenny kissed Kyle’s cheek and took his empty glass before holding his elbow out for Nancy. As they walked away, he noticed a man walking towards the two they just left. Kenny’s heart dropped. He recognized the man and it wasn’t good. He would have to tell Kyle about him later.

“Oh don’t worry about Jeremy. He’s a harmless toolbag.”

Kenny smiled at Nancy’s choice of words. “Tool bag, yes. Harmless, no.”

“Oh? You know him from the escort agency?”

Kenny smiled. That’s where he recognized her. She use to work with him until a few years ago. All anyone ever said was she quit, now Kenny knew why.

“I can’t discuss such matters. We have a very strict confidentiality policy. You would know that.” Kenny stated as they reached the bar.

“Ah, yes. That’s where I met Albert. Is that how you met Kyle?”

“Kyle and I have been friends since we were young lads playing fireman in preschool.”

“That’s so sweet. He is such a sweetheart. I just want to-” Nancy reached over and pinched Kenny’s cheeks. “But you’ll do. Albert says I can’t do that to his worker. And his child doesn’t really care for me. Which is fine, after all, he is a toolbag.”

Kenny looked back over to the men they left. He could tell Kyle was hiding a lot of anger. He knew that look well from his childhood. And the smirk on Jeremy’s face, said it all. “That’s his son?”

“Unfortunately, yes. Albert is such a sweet man. He would give the world to his son, but unfortunately, his son is anything but. But that’s fine. I try my best because I love my Alby-bear.” Nancy turned to Kenny with glare. “Tell him I said that and I will have your nuts.”

“Don’t worry. I won’t say a word.”

“And I won’t tell him you guys aren’t actually engaged.”

Kenny turned to the lady, shocked. Four glasses of wine were set down for them and Nancy picked up two. Kenny followed and looked around to see if anyone else had heard that. 

“Don’t worry. You guys are very convincing, but next time, wear rings.”

“Fuck. We have been telling people we haven’t picked them out yet. Guess it’s too late to act like I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Oh yeah, but like I said, don’t worry. You won’t hear a thing from me about it.” Nancy smiled at her husband. “Darling, Kenny here said I could help out with the wedding plans!”

Kyle glared at Kenny, took the glass from his hand, and took a big swig. Kenny smiled, trying to convey to Kyle it was okay as he placed his hand on his back.

“Oh, now sweetie, you can’t just invite yourself-”

“Oh, no. I would love her help!” Kenny said excitedly. “We have been having trouble deciding what we want anyways. It would be nice to have an outside opinion.”

Jeremy glared at the couple. “How did you two meet?”

“We’ve known each other since preschool. We grew up together.”

“So you know each other very well? Kyle, are you aware that-”

“Oh Albert!” 

Kenny felt Kyle let out his breath as another suit interrupted Jeremy. While the couple were distracted, Kenny leaned over and whisper into Kyle’s ear.

“Don’t worry, I know Nancy from work she's cool, dude. It’s Jeremy you have to watch out for.”

“I know. He hates me enough as it is.”

As the night went on, Kyle got drunker and drunker. Kenny wasn’t in much better shape since, Nancy made sure their glasses were full. She said it was because she had never seen Kyle this relaxed before. Kenny could see her point. He had been uptight most of the night. Kenny had seen Kyle wound tight a few times, but this was a whole new level.

As Kenny was about to excuse them from the party and take his charge him and possibly nurse his hangover, they were once more approached by Jeremy. Kenny could see the malice in his eyes.

“Leaving so soon? But I haven’t even congratulated you two yet.”

Kenny watched Kyle’s face scrunch up in hatred. 

Jeremy projected his voice, making it way louder than what it needed to be, “Congratulations, Broflovski,” he said Kyle’s name with such venom Kenny could feel the spit, “on your engagement to a hooker.”

“Paron me?” Albert questioned, Kenny watched as Nancy forced a slight smile on her face. This was not going to fly in front of her, and he knew it. “A hooker?”

“Oh, they didn’t tell you? He is nothing more than a common street whore.”

“Actually,” Kyle spoke up in a calm voice, surprising Kenny. “My fiance is a high class escort. He works for the best and most expensive escort business in Denver. He hasn’t been a “common street whore” as you so elegantly put it, for quite a few years. And to know this fact, you would have had to hire him, which means, the only way you can get laid is by hiring sex workers. I mean there is nothing wrong with this. We all have to get off somehow, but you’re doing nothing but embarrassing yourself.”

“I was talking about his “high class escort” status. He’s more than just an escort, he also fuck’s every client.”

“That’s not true, I refused to fuck you for starters.” Kenny said grinning and leaned towards Jeremy, “And sadly, you say one more word, and I get to tell everyone why I refused and why you are banned from sleeping with nothing but common whores.” 

When Kenny stood back, Kyle took his face between his hands and kissed him. “Come, love, let's go home.” Kenny’s heart hammered in his chest. He loved everything Kyle just said.

“Nice to meet you guys. Nancy we need to lunch sometime.”

“Take care, darlings.” She waved at them before turning to her husband and whispering into his ear.

Kenny paid no mind to the people as they passed, Kyle’s full weight leaning on him. Kyle pulled out his phone and handed it to Kenny. “Lyft. I’m too drunk for this shit.”

Kenny chuckled as he got them a ride out of there. 

***

**Get Laid.**

Kenny all but carried Kyle to his apartment. He fished the keys out of the drunks pockets and opened the door. The two tumbled into the apartment giggling. Kenny threw their jackets over a chair before he set Kyle down on the couch and the redhead pulled him down next to him.

“I’m so fired.” Kyle giggled. “Like I’m fucking toast. I will never be able to work again in a law firm.”

“Are you kidding?” Kenny said placing an arm around his friend. “Nancy would kill her husband if he fired you. She loves you.”

“I just said his  _ son _ could only get laid by sex workers. And I know Nancy use to be one.”

“Nancy was an escort and she would seriously  _ kill _ Albert if he fires you.”

The two were quiet for a long moment. Kenny debated going home, but he hadn’t been actually excused by Kyle and it wasn’t midnight yet, meaning he was still under his hiring agreement.

“Is it true you sleep with most clients.” Kyle asked. Kenny couldn’t see the redheads face, but he knew there was no malice behind his words.

“For the most part, but, not as part of being hired because it goes against company policy. More like they tip me for it.”

“How much?”

“It’s a tip so usually whatever they want.”

“$500?”

Kenny pulled away and looked at Kyle. “Are you propositioning sex from me?”

Kyle smiled lazily and Kenny couldn’t help but think of how gorgeous his friend was. “Perhaps.”

Kenny’s heart beat picked up. He wanted to. He would fuck Kyle daily and for free. 

“No,” Kenny said shocking himself.

Kyle’s face fell. “Oh, okay.” The redhead curled away from Kenny. “You can leave.”

“Now I will, if you want to.”

Kyle glared at Kenny. “The fuck is your problem, dude?”

“Well,” Kenny grabbed Kyle’s arm and kissed his wrist. His head began to spin from the alcohol and lust. “Because, if we are going to have sex, I don’t want money to be involved. I don’t want this to be a business transaction. Nor do I want it to be because now you can have something shitbag couldn’t.”

Kyle’s lazy smile came back. “Kenny, do you have something to confess?”

“You are a little shit.”

“Says the person who hid their job from one of their best friends.”

“You got me there.” Kenny moved so he was above the man, looking into his emerald eyes. “Kyle, you are the most beautiful redhead I have ever come in contact with. And my job has placed me in contact with some very attractive people. Scratch that, you are the most beautiful person I’ve come in contact with ever.”

“This isn’t just the alcohol talking?”

“We can try and find those basement nerds, create another time vortex and you can go ask my 16 year old, Kyle in a man bun, distracted during state finals of basketball loving ass.”

“Should have said something.” Kyle reached up and pulled Kenny down to him. “Because you have been my masturbation fantasy for so long.”

“Me?” Kenny kissed Kyle. “You could have said something. You know I’m open about things.”

“You have been a sex worker since we graduated high school. Not to mention you never date. I figured you weren’t interested in this kind of thing.”

“I don’t date because it’s seriously impossible to find someone that is okay with you doing this. Sure they are fine if they know how much money you make. Or if they think you will quiet once you start dating them.”

Kyle kissed Kenny. “You do what you want. And do me. Please. I’m so fucking-”

Kenny didn’t let Kyle finish. He kissed Kyle, biting his bottom lip as he pulled away. He was delighted to hear the redhead below him moan. “My room. Up stairs. Now.”

“Why? This is so hot right here,” Kenny gestured to the large windows before them. 

Kyle moaned again. “Yes, but this couch sucks for having sex on. I already know this. Now get your ass upstairs.”

Kenny stood up and pulled Kyle up off the couch and into him. He slowly walked backwards, trying to keep his lips in contact with his lovers. Kyle chuckled and pulled the blonde towards himself at the bottom of the stairs. Their lips clashed in an open mouth kiss. It was Kenny’s turn to moan as Kyle’s tongue touched his own. The sudden dominance and power coming from the redhead was intoxicating. Kenny wasn’t sure if he wanted to fuck the man or be fucked.

Kyle pulled away and turned Kenny around smacking his ass. “Go.”

Kenny grabbed Kyle’s hand and pulled him up the stairs with him. Once at the top, Kenny pinned the redhead against the bedroom door. He felt Kyle smile against his lips before the door suddenly opened. The blonde stumbled through and turned to the gorgeous man before him. Kyle’s smile fell and with it so did Kenny’s. He started thinking perhaps Kyle thought he was making a mistake.

“I’ve never done anything like this before.”

“What? The spontaneous sex? The hooking up with your best friend? Or the male on male action?”    
“All of it?”

Kenny’s smile returned full force and he pulled Kyle into the bedroom with him. “Okay, well, then a few questions. Do you have lube?” 

“Of course.”

“I mean real lube. Not lotion.”

“Like I said, of course. And condoms.”

Kenny kissed Kyle and pulled him backwards towards the bed. “Good. The next question is do you want to fuck me? Or would you like me to fuck you?”

Kyle moaned as Kenny began kissing down his jaw and neck and began unbuttoning his shirt. “I-I don’t know. God. Both. Either.”

“Alrighty, Mr “I can make executive decisions under pressure unless that pressure is sex.”” Kyle pinched Kenny’s arm causing the blonde to laugh. “How about you fuck me, and I’ll walk you through it so you know what to expect.”

“Sounds great. As long as by the end of this, there is an impression of you in my matress.”

Kenny moaned against the redheads collarbone as he drug his teeth along it. He was pleased by the sounds his lover was letting loose. He pulled the shirt off and threw it to the floor along with the man’s undershirt.

“That’s expensive-”

“Fuck you. I’ll buy you a new one if it’s ruined.”

Kyle moaned as Kenny teased his nipple. “Oh, I did not know that about myself.”

“No?” Kenny licked one as he pinched the other gently.

“Fuck, yes.”

Kenny smiled and made to pull his own shirt over his head. The blonde got stuck, having forgotten to unbutton the sleeves and top few buttons. Kyle laughed at his misfortune but took this opportunity to take advantage of him. Kyle unbuttoned his pants and pulled up his undershirt before giving Kennys chest the same treatment his just received. Kenny moaned and struggled a bit in his shirt. 

The redhead took pity on him and brought the shirt back down before helping him properly undress. Once both shirts had been removed, Kyle pushed Kenny onto the bed and followed the blonde as he scooted up towards the middle of it. He kissed his way down Kenny’s chest. The blonde watched, running his hands through the red curls. When he reached the top of his underwear, Kyle sat up and pulled Kenny’s left leg up. He carefully untied this shoe and took it off along with his sock, kissed his ankle before doing the same to the other.

Kenny’s heart fluttered in his chest. Kyle wasn’t just having sex with him, he was going to make love to him. This was a whole new experience for the blonde. 

“I guess we are both trying something new tonight.” Kyle stated before laying his right leg down. 

“Did not mean to say that out loud.” 

“I didn’t mean to proposition you for sex either.”

Kenny laughed as Kyle hovered over him. The redhead kissed him gently. “I’m really glad I did though.”

Kyle went back to slowly undressing Kenny. As he pulled down the blonde's slacks, he kissed his legs. Soon, they too, joined the other cloths on the floor. Kenny got up on his elbows and watched as Kyle stood back up and removed his own pants, having kicked off his shoes at some point, and socks. They took a moment to admire each other. Kenny was taking in the redheads body, having not seen it in this state of dress since basketball nearly thirteen years ago.

“Still as amazing as ever,” Kyle stated before crawling back on the bed.

“I can say the same.”

Kenny wound his fingers into Kyle’s hair as he began kissing his way back up. He stopped at the edge of Kenny’s boxer briefs to pull the hem down a bit and attack his hip bone. Kenny loved that spot and was glad Kyle discovered it without him saying so. Kenny’s toes curled and tugged on Kyle’s hair as he moaned.

“Found your weak spot.” 

“Yeah, you could say that.”

Kyle did the same to the other side before continuing back on his mission. When his mouth finally found Kenny’s, he set the tone for slow and sensual. The blonde had never had such treatment and wasn’t completely sure what to do. He drug his nails up Kyle’s side and down his back. The redhead let out a shiver at the sensation.

“Your nails. That’s hot.”

“Manicures do wonders.”

“Manicure? Really?”

“Oh yes.” To prove his point, Kenny ran his nails down Kyles back before grabbing his butt and rubbing their erections together. “Manicures are amazing.”

“Yeah,” Kyle breathed. “Hey Kenny.” Kenny hummed as he kissed the man’s neck. “Can I suck you?”

Kenny moaned at the thought of Kyle’s mouth around his dick. “Oh god yes.”

Kyle’s mouth soon found his hip again. Kenny could have sworn Kyle breathing on his dick would have been enough to make him cum right there. He could feel the redheads hot breath through his underwear as they were slowly taken off. His erection was barely freed before he felt Kyle lick his shaft from base to tip. His fingers were lost in the curls. He loved Kyle’s hair and it was definitely as great as he imagined even if he did keep it shorter now.

“Hair.”

Kenny’s hands flew out of the redhead curls. “Shit sorry!”

“Don’t be, I like it.” 

Kyle looked up at Kenny with half lidded eyes. Kenny smiled as he ran his hands through the curls and tugged gently. There was something amazing about Kyle licking the head of his dick as his eyes rolled back into his head. Kenny bit his lower lip as he pulled a bit on Kyle’s hair to get his mouth around his dick. The redhead complied and sucked on the head before he let it pop from his mouth. He licked Kenny’s shaft again before sucking on one of his balls. Kenny whimpered a bit as Kyle did the same to the other. He kissed his way back to the tip of Kenny’s dick, licked the tip, then slowly began sucking it.

Kenny moaned loud. He hadn’t meant to even moan, but Kyle actually made him. Kenny was shocked for the umteeth time that night. What he lacked in experience was easily made up for by being male and knowing what felt good. And it was from Kyle. That’s what he was enjoying most. It wasn’t a client that had red hair like Kyle. It wasn’t a client that was tall and pale like Kyle. It was Kyle, his friend of thirty some odd years, with his mouth on his cock, sucking slowly as if he was making love to it. And he was.

“Please god, you have to stop.” Kenny whined and he pulled on Kyle’s hair.

“But why?”

“Because, if I cum now, I can’t fuck you later.”

“So fuck me in the morning.”

Kenny moaned at the prospect of waking up next to Kyle and have morning sex. It was hard to say no to such a tantalizing offer, especially with his hot mouth working it’s magic. 

“Kyle.”

“Moaning my name like that, just makes me want to suck your dick more.”

Kenny whimpered. He wasn’t going to be able to hold back. “Kyle!” 

He tugged on the red hair, trying to pull him off, but Kyle just took it as encouragement. The red head used one hand to stroke what his mouth couldn’t take as he drug a finger from the base of his balls back towards his ass. The feel of his nail gently dragging along the skin along with the implications left in his mind what that finger planned to do, drove Kenny over. He held the redhead still as he thrusted into his mouth, screaming his name as he came.

Kenny fell back on the bed, hands loosening from the curls. Kyle didn’t move. His back was arched, head bowed, and he was unmoving. Kenny was taken down off his post orgams high.

“Shit, Kyle, I’m sorry!”

“Fuck. Why?” He groaned.

“Did I hurt you?”

Kyle shook his head. “Sec.”

Complete silence fell over them as Kenny stroked Kyle’s hair. Slowly the other moved and looked at Kenny. He then noticed, the man had his own dick and balls between his fingers in a makeshift cock ring.

“Fuck. That was so hot. I almost came from it. Fuck. That’s a new one.”

Kenny chuckled. “I’ve never screamed anyone’s name like that.”

“Obviously it’s the alcohol.”

Kenny laughed as he pulled Kyle on top of him and kissed him. The redhead pulled back and gave Kenny a concerned look. 

“Is semen kosher?”

Kenny laughed, still holding the red head’s face. “I don’t know.”

Kyle shrugged and smiled. He leaned down and kissed Kenny, rubbing his erection against the other’s hip.

“Kind of want to eat your ass now.”

Kenny patted the man’s back. “Another time. Like freshly showered time.”

“Okay so in the morning.”

Kenny was getting really pissed at his heart racing all the time like a schoolgirl in love. “Yeah, that’s fine.” He breathed before kissing Kyle again. “Now, for phase two. Get your lube.”

Kyle crawled across the bed to a night stand. Kenny couldn't help but slap his ass as he dug around for his lube. They both smiled as Kyle pulled out the tube and a condom. 

“I read up on this,” Kyle stated, settling between Kenny’s legs.

“Yeah?”

“Of course. Nerd here. If the internet hasn’t steered me wrong, the goal is loosen you enough that you can take my dick without it being painful.”

“Yeah and…” Kenny trailed off as he grabbed Kyle’s right hand. “You can start off with this one.” He sucked on the man’s middle finger. “But you’ll want these ones.” He sucked on three fingers and received a moan. “And trust me when I say I’m ready.”

“Okay,” Kyle breathed and slowly took his hand back from Kenny.

Kenny propped himself up on his elbows so he could watch. Kyle placed a dab of lube on his finger. Kenny indicated a little more was needed, so Kyle complied. Satisfied, he spread his legs wider and let the man continue. He watched Kyle's face, completely focused with the task at hand. The cool lube touched his hole before being spread around a bit. Slowly, almost agonizingly, Kyle inserted his middle finger. Kenny let out a low moan, enjoying the sensation.

“I didn't realize it would be this warm or tight.”

Kenny smiled. “You know, for being the smart one-”

Kyle hooked his finger and found Kenny's prostate easily. The blonde let out a moan, closing his eyes for a moment.

“Your recum is always 1° warmer than the rest of you at least when you take your temperature,” Kenny managed to say in one breath. 

“Good to know.” 

Kyle moved his finger around a bit before pulling it out, adding a bit more lube and a second finger. Kenny couldn't help about but laugh as Kyle did things by the book. 

“You don't have to be so gentle.”

Kyle bent down and kissed the inside if Kenny's thigh. “I want to be though.”

It was torture for Kenny. He was use to people using him for sex, even in his teens. He was not use to being in the receiving end of slow and sensual. As Kyle fingered him, he would also kiss random parts of Kenny. 

“Please, fuck me.”

“I'm not even up to three fingers yet.” Kenny didn't need to look to know Kyle was smirking.

“I know. But remember what I said about trust me when I say I'm ready.”

Kyle withdrew his fingers. Kenny let it a sigh and opened his eyes. He was hoping to see Kyle undress. Instead the redhead was in the same place and a sexy smirk in his face. Without his eyes leaving Kenny's, he inserted three finger. Kenny gasped at the unexpected intrusion.

“I thought you were ready.”

“Fuck you.” Kenny moaned. How he managed to maintain eye contact baffled him. “I am ready. And if you don't fuuuuuu-” he let out a moan mid word as Kyle massaged his prostate. “-uuuck me now, I will ride you.”

Kyle smiled but withdrew his fingers and kneeled on the bed. Kenny watched with delight as Kyle removed his underwear. As every new inch of flesh was revealed, Kenny thought of all the things he was going to do. He was going to lick that delicious V, nimble his hip, definitely mark every inch of skin. As Kyle's dick was freed from it's prison, Kenny let out a small whimper.

“Like what you see?”

“You could say that.”

Without breaking their eye contact, Kyle ripped open the condom package and rolled it on. He lubed up the condom and threw it to the side of the bed. Kenny watched Kyle's face get closer. When he could reach he wrapped his arms around the others neck and laid back on the bed, pulling the redhead with him. Kyle kissed him lightly as his dick searched Kenny's entrance. 

“Kyle, you're going to have to sit up a moment.”

Kyle sat up and allowed Kenny to move himself into a better position. 

“Now, I know what you want to do, but don't make this more complicated than it needs to be. Put your dick in me now, then we can make out.”

Kyle let out a chuckle but followed Kenny's instructions. Kenny did his best to not look away from Kyle as Kyle watched his dick disappear into Kenny. Once fully in, Kyle stayed still.

“Kyle you don't-”

“This is for me, not you.” He groaned. 

Kenny smiled. “You're not going to last long are you?” He squeezed the dick inside him, causing the man to moan.

“Fuck.”

Kenny shifted a bit and pulled Kyle down into him. He wiggled his hips as he kissed his lover. Kyle began slowly thrusting his hips. His hand grasped at Kenny's fresh erection. Kenny groaned into Kyle's shoulder as the other let out a moan.

“Stop that. It feels so good.”

“You did it this time!” Kenny protested.

The air was filled with muffled grunts and groans as the two kissed. Kenny was surprised at himself for behind so close so soon after cumming. But he was going to need more stimulation to orgasm again. He wrapped his legs around Kyle and began meeting his thrusts. The redhead broke their kissing and just stared into Kenny's eyes. Kenny felt he could get lost in the sea of green when they were focused in him like that.

It was too much for Kenny yet bit enough. He started moving his hips faster, all but riding Kyle's dick himself. The redhead moaned and his hand stopped moving on Kenny's prick. Kenny wrapped his hand around Kyle's and used it to masturbate himself.

“Kenny. God. Please I can't…”

“Don't hold back.”

Kenny laid back and watched Kyle as he tried his best to hold back his own orgasm. It didn't take much. Kyle looked at Kenny and his resolve disappeared. Kenny could feel Kyle's dick get harder in him before he came. He rode Kyle through his orgasm, and refused to stop. He needed to get off. He was so close.

“Fuck. Kenny. Stop God damn mother-” Kyle all but screamed as his whole body shook. And Kenny came. Knowing Kyle not only had two orgasms back to back, but that he did it, triggered his own. He came moaning Kyle's name.

The redhead collapsed on top if him as they both tried to regain their breath. 

“I've never done that before.”

“Didn't know anyone could.”

“Me neither. I'm so tired now.”

Kenny moved the sweaty curls and kissed Kyle's temple. “Give me a bit and I will clean us both up.”

***

**Gatorade.**

True to his word, Kenny did his best to clean his, now, unconscious friend and himself. He tucked Kyle under the covers and prepared for his usual after sex ritual. Normally he wouldn’t still be at a client’s house. 

He made his way downstairs and into the luxurious kitchen. He opened the fridge and searched it, hoping his friend would have what he needed. Kenny closed the door and reopened it just to make sure. He crossed his arms and thought for a moment where Kyle would normally keep his bottled water and such. Pantry. Kenny opened the door and discovered his friend was a dirty scoundrel. Powerade. No matter what people said, the two were not the same. 

Kenny made his way upstairs and back into Kyle’s bedroom. He was prepared to just go to bed without the overly sugary drink. As he crawled into bed and Kyle curled around him, the craving for the drink hit full force. It was a part of a ritual and not drinking the sweet nectar felt wrong.

“Kyle,” Kenny whispered and received a groan. “Do you have Gatorade somewhere?”

“Powerade.”

“Yeah and you’re a sick bastard but I forgive you. I need Gatorade.”

“Can’t wait?”

“No. It’s like… this one thing. I have to have it after sex.”

“Weirdo. Corner store 24.”

Kenny moved to get out of bed, giving Kyle a peck on his forehead. “Stealing your clothes because I am not wearing my rented tux.”

“Fair. Dresser. Hurry.”

Kenny quickly dressed, putting on only jeans, a hoodie, and flip-flops. He bent over the bed and kissed Kyle again before grabbing his wallet, phone and Kyle’s keys before leaving the apartment. Kenny all but ran to the store. He was so delighted they had what he wanted and even the correct flavor. Kenny grabbed a thing of orange Gatorade, opened it and took a big gulp. He sighed in relief as the cool liquid descended to his stomach. He studied the cooler of drinks for a moment. If Kyle had his way, they would be having sex the next morning so Kenny grabbed another bottle. Then he smiled and grabbed eight more. If he had his way, him and Kyle would have sex everywhere.

The cashier gave him a strange look as he rang up 10 bottles of orange Gatorade. Kenny smiled as he took his bag and took another drink. He left the store in a better mode and made his way back to Kyle’s. He couldn’t help but think of what it would be like to not just sleep next to another person but wake up with them as well. Kenny couldn’t remember the last time he spent time in bed with someone he hadn’t been paid to do so with.

Kenny smiled as he rounded the corner to go into the apartment building. A bang caught the blonde’s attention. He knew that wet sensation. He knew this feeling all too well. Kenny looked down at his stomach and watched for a moment as a dark spot appeared on his borrowed hoodie. He knew what was about to happen. With what little adrenaline was coursing through his system, Kenny pulled his phone out.

He opened his messenger app, tapped Kyle, and hit the microphone button.

“I love you. I’ll be back.” Kenny said as he slid down the building wall. He hit send and took a deep breath.

The last thing he saw was someone running towards him. He hoped they didn’t try to save him. 

***

It was way too bright for Kenny. He hated dieing because everything was so sensitive. He pulled his blanket over his head and groaned. Of course his bones ached. It was bad enough when he aged 10 years in a few hours. Ageing 30 years was far worse. He did set a new record. Eight months with no deaths.

“Good morning sunshine.”

Kenny threw the covers off himself and looked at the intruder. Kyle sat on the floor against his door. He sat up, groaning as he did so. Dying at 50 was going to suck.

“Kyle, I can-”

“I was pretty mad this morning. I woke up and I distinctly remember you saying you were going out for Gatorade and would be back.”

“Kyle-”

“Let me finish.” Kyle took a deep breath. “I was pissed because you weren’t there and neither were your clothes so I got dressed. But couldn’t find my favorite hoodie. The plot thickens. When I was at the stop sign in front of my apartment building, I noticed a bag of orange Gatorade on the sidewalk. A lot of Gatorade. I got worried and rushed to your apartment. Kenny. You were like… You… You were like 20 when I got here and now you’re normal. How?”

“Kenny drug his hand down his face. I can explain. I can tell you the whole story, but you won't remember.”

“What happened to you?”

“I was shot.”

“Shot?”

“Yeah, I was shot. I died. I came back. I’m glad it was just a day.”

Kyle was silent for a moment. Kenny didn’t blame him. It was a crazy experience for anyone not use to it. The redhead finally stood and moved towards the bed, taking a seat on the edge. “It explains this, I guess.”

Kyle pulled out his phone and hit a button. Kenny heard his own raspy faint voice mixed with some yelling in the background. Silence hung in the air around the couple.

“I’m sorry Kenny.”

The blonde pulled Kyle towards him and kissed his forehead. “You didn’t shoot me.”

Kyle rested his head on kenny’s Shoulder. “No but I’m sure it was meant for me. Someone has been sending me death threats. I was planing on moving next week. The cops are working on the evidence but we both know how great they are at that.”

“It’s fine dude. I come back. Besides this just means we have to keep a stock of Gatorade in your fridge.” 

He felt the redhead smile and laugh a little. “Guess this means it wasn’t a one time thing?”

Kenny’s heart broke a little at the thought of only having last night. “If you want it to be, it will be.”

“And if I don’t?”

“It doesn’t have to be.”

“What about your job?” Kyle pulled away to look into Kenny’s eyes. He really did love Kyle, as a friend and little more, but he didn’t want to give up his job.

“What about it?”

“Are they okay with you being in a relationship? I don’t want you to get fired because they feel like a jealous boyfriend is bad for business.”

Kenny smiled.  _ Boyfriend _ . “It’s okay. And I won’t sleep with people if you-”

“That’s fine. I don’t want you to make changes for me. Just tell me when you do. You can even keep your own space. We don’t need to rush this.”

Kenny laughed and laid back down. “Except your boss thinks we are engaged.”

Kyle shrugged. “Oh well. We’ll take it slow anyways. Not like I have a job-”

Kyles phone rang. He looked at it and let out a sigh. Kenny felt the room grow heavy. 

“Speak of the devil. Hello Mr Johnson.”

Kyle’s face was completely neutral as the person on the other side talked. Every so often he would answer with “Yes.” and “I see.”

Kenny knew Kyle wouldn’t get fired but the man’s face concerned him. He showed no emotion. When he hung up the phone his hands were shaking. He laid down on the bed with Kenny and curled up against him. Kenny rubbed the man’s back.

“Well, I know who shot you.”

“If you say-”

“Jeremy.” Somehow Kenny wasn’t surprised. He knew the man was pretty pissed when they had left last night. “He’s also the one sending death threats. He was stopped for acting suspicious around my apartment. The found an unregistered gun and when questioned, he cracked.”

“Just like that?”

“I guess. He confessed to everything. Ever. Including beating more than one sex worker to the point of unconsciousness. Guess that’s why-”

“Yeah. You know us South Park boys. What does that mean for you?”

“Well, you weren’t wrong about not being fired.”

“Told you Nancy loves you.”

“Yeah and I guess Albert sees me as his son. Which is why Jeremy wanted me gone.”

Kenny was silent as his mind tried to wrap around what Kyle was saying. Albert saw him as a son which probably means now, Kyle was going to get all the benefits Jeremy would have gotten. “Should I make midnight runs for Gatorade more often?”

“No, I will keep the fridge stocked.” Kyle shifted against Kenny. He thought for a moment he was just feeling things. “Now I believe you owe me a good hard fucking.”

Kenny grinned and rolled towards Kyle. “I believe I do.”

 

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading. For those of you wondering, YES this is a jacksfilms reference! For those of you not wondering, ignore it!
> 
> Feedback and comments are 1000% welcome and give me life. <3


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